Monday, October 12, 2009

Crash Landing

The word came a week later than we had originally hoped. Linda and I were on the way to the National Storytelling Festival in Jonesborough, Tennessee, when my cell phone rang. It was my District Superintendent, calling to tell me that my request for funding for bariatric surgery had been denied.

On one hand I understand the decision. Ours is a partially self-funded insurance group; those who are members pay all the premiums. No government bail-out. Last year we experienced a $1700 increase in our personal deductibles and a 20% increase in premiums. The committee is looking at a 19% increase in premiums this year, based on claims through the first 9 months. They also looked at the fact that no other major carriers in the state carry that coverage. (It is still looked upon as "elective" or "cosmetic" surgery. To allow me to be covered would have opened up a can or worms for them...or rather a lot of folks that would also want coverage. I was told that my presentation was by far the most compelling they had seen in recent years...but they still had to deny my request. So in a way I understand.

On the other hand, I feel like I am part of an organization that lacks the compassion it preaches. It's not a comfortable feeling, even more so since I don't have the option of leaving it for some more friendly group. If being morbidly obese becomes considered an "official" handicapping condition, attitudes will change, as will the coverages for medical relief. I remember when we had no accomodations for wheelchairs, curbcuts, restroom stall sizes, elevator requirements, doorway widths, etc. All these have come about in my lifetime. In years ahead perhaps those of us who need surgical intervention for health reasons (not cosmetic)will benefit from a more enlightenend view of the disorder.

So I tried.

Linda was very disappointed, much more than I was. And yet, I find little pockets of anger and resentment popping up here and there. The hope of the possibility of a surgical intervention was definitely something hard to give up for both of us. While we knew it was a long shot, and prepared as we were, it was still a hard landing onto the field of reality. We survived, but are still not intact.

It was good that we were not at home when we got the news because we immediately had other things to focus on, and were surrounded by a supportive community that did not rely upon the church for its validity. We actually enjoyed the trip away, did a lot of things together. Linda drove the car for much of the trip (we took her new little Ford Focus). We enjoyed the 39 miles per gallon we got most of the trip.

We heard many, many storytellers, renewed friendships, made new friends, and enjoyed the cool but very nice weather of the mountains.

Foodwise, we had taken a supply of my low-carb drinks and adjusted our stops to places we could honor that committment with eating well...and right. We did eat out three or four times, but avoided starchy and sweet foods. And while I have not been back to the scales since we returned, I feel like I held my own, and am back in my regular routine now.


Back at home the weather is cooler. I am happy to find that I have an almost new collection of long-sleeved shirts that fit me fine now. I am looking forward to being able to purchase some new clothes soon.

More later...time to go find another meal of delicious low-carb food!

2 comments:

  1. Roger,

    First I want to say, this sucks. Just to get that out of the way. Thank you for trusting enough to share your feelings on this. You and Linda are in my prayers. Love to you both, Y.

    ReplyDelete